RH Modern Launch: Begged, Borrowed, & Stolen
On Grimm (and most shows), we get our shooting schedule only a day or two before a new episode starts, so life is lived last minute. I found out that I was a SWF (start work finish, meaning all of my episode's work is done in one day) for episode 510 and my mom happened to be in town helping me with Cal (Chris is on tour), so we flew to LA to do some press for the launch of Season Five. My publicist managed an invitation for me to attend the launch party for RH Modern, the new modern furniture spinoff from Restoration Hardware. I was thrilled, since I am in the middle of a full scale renovation of my own house, spending Cal's college tuition on bathroom tile and copper pipes. With that in mind, I decided not to purchase anything new for the trip, so upon arrival we headed to The A List, a fashion PR company and the hosts for the event, whom my publicist said would "love" to dress me and would let me "shop the showroom" i.e. snag some major swag to take home (and tweet about).
What became clear right away was that I am not a member of the A List, or B List or C List for that matter. Maybe the G List, when Dreama Walker isn't available. Let me just say that if you ever find yourself in need of an ego check, get yourself to Los Angeles. It's not worth going into detail, but a piece of sugar free gum stuck to the bottom of Kim Kardashian's shoe would have gotten more love than me in that place. My escort eventually warmed to me (a LITTLE) when learning that the event for which I was "shopping" was the one they were hosting that night. I only had to mention it twice. Sigh.
But all was water under the bridge when I found this Shoshanna dress (which was a sample, so had to be returned, sadly). I loved it immediately. It was a fresh length and the colors of the floral seemed vibrant and new enough for the design crowd set. My only issue was the top panel. I'm pretty self-conscious about my upper half thanks to my udders; These days, all of my clothes make me feel like a retired linebacker. Just very... swollen. So I added this Armani Exchange jacket (a gift from my showroom shop) to detract from the bosom region, hopefully defining my shape a little better and slimming my torso. I decided to spend the dollars on my favorite makeup master Andre Sarmiento to fix my new-ish mom eye bags. I did hair myself, since I'd have been out the price of a new bathroom fixture for hiring a pro. I finished the look with an old pair of Pollini pumps that I found at a Barney's mega sale a million-ish years ago. They are preposterously uncomfortable, but I figured there'd be plenty of mammoth couches on which to rest my feet at the event.
I hit the party with my friend and partner in small crimes and misdemeanors, Ellie Knaus (www.chelseyandkelsey.com). There was no red carpet, but we were greeted with peach bellinis upon arrival, as well as passed trays of sashimi apps: "they have a ceviche-like flavor profile" according to one of the servers. Oh, LA.
The new store's polished brass and modern lines were upstaged only by Rashida Jones and Kelly Oxford holding court amidst the goliath-sized white linen sofas, which Ellie noticed were entirely impractical for decor at a peach bellini party. I'd like to interview the poor intern tasked with Shout-wiping the sofas the morning after. We stayed for about 37 minutes and then hoofed it back to my hotel (my toes are still sore) for some italian food and a gab session before turning in at 10pm. Mom lyfe 4eva.
Dress: Shoshanna (borrowed)
Shoes: Pollini (too old to remember)
Leather Jacket: Armani Exchange (gifted)
Makeup: Andre Sarmiento ($250)
Total Cost of Look: $250